{"id":4067,"date":"2014-06-26T07:54:26","date_gmt":"2014-06-26T12:54:26","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/chicagoexecutivecoaching.com\/smartleadership\/?p=4067"},"modified":"2026-04-19T16:25:51","modified_gmt":"2026-04-19T21:25:51","slug":"distracted-listening-a-two-minute-solution","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/chicagoexecutivecoaching.com\/smartleadership\/distracted-listening-a-two-minute-solution\/","title":{"rendered":"Distracted Listening &#8211; A Two Minute Solution"},"content":{"rendered":"<div id=\"bsf_rt_marker\"><\/div>\t\t<div data-elementor-type=\"wp-post\" data-elementor-id=\"4067\" class=\"elementor elementor-4067\" data-elementor-post-type=\"post\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-729f8d39 e-con-full e-flex e-con e-parent\" data-id=\"729f8d39\" data-element_type=\"container\" data-e-type=\"container\" data-settings=\"{&quot;background_background&quot;:&quot;classic&quot;}\">\n\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-3d55f644 e-con-full e-flex e-con e-child\" data-id=\"3d55f644\" data-element_type=\"container\" data-e-type=\"container\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-fb2312 elementor-widget elementor-widget-theme-post-title elementor-page-title elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"fb2312\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"theme-post-title.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h1 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">Distracted Listening &#8211; A Two Minute Solution<\/h1>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-7a0d9a04 elementor-align-center elementor-widget elementor-widget-post-info\" data-id=\"7a0d9a04\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"post-info.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<ul class=\"elementor-inline-items elementor-icon-list-items elementor-post-info\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<li class=\"elementor-icon-list-item elementor-repeater-item-545bbe2 elementor-inline-item\" itemprop=\"author\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<a href=\"https:\/\/chicagoexecutivecoaching.com\/smartleadership\/author\/lbwebmaster\/\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-icon-list-icon\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<svg aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"e-font-icon-svg e-far-user-circle\" viewBox=\"0 0 496 512\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\"><path d=\"M248 104c-53 0-96 43-96 96s43 96 96 96 96-43 96-96-43-96-96-96zm0 144c-26.5 0-48-21.5-48-48s21.5-48 48-48 48 21.5 48 48-21.5 48-48 48zm0-240C111 8 0 119 0 256s111 248 248 248 248-111 248-248S385 8 248 8zm0 448c-49.7 0-95.1-18.3-130.1-48.4 14.9-23 40.4-38.6 69.6-39.5 20.8 6.4 40.6 9.6 60.5 9.6s39.7-3.1 60.5-9.6c29.2 1 54.7 16.5 69.6 39.5-35 30.1-80.4 48.4-130.1 48.4zm162.7-84.1c-24.4-31.4-62.1-51.9-105.1-51.9-10.2 0-26 9.6-57.6 9.6-31.5 0-47.4-9.6-57.6-9.6-42.9 0-80.6 20.5-105.1 51.9C61.9 339.2 48 299.2 48 256c0-110.3 89.7-200 200-200s200 89.7 200 200c0 43.2-13.9 83.2-37.3 115.9z\"><\/path><\/svg>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-icon-list-text elementor-post-info__item elementor-post-info__item--type-author\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\tTom Lemanski\t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t\t\t\t<\/li>\n\t\t\t\t<li class=\"elementor-icon-list-item elementor-repeater-item-b1f0a24 elementor-inline-item\" itemprop=\"commentCount\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<a href=\"https:\/\/chicagoexecutivecoaching.com\/smartleadership\/distracted-listening-a-two-minute-solution\/#respond\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-icon-list-icon\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<svg aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"e-font-icon-svg e-far-comment-dots\" viewBox=\"0 0 512 512\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\"><path d=\"M144 208c-17.7 0-32 14.3-32 32s14.3 32 32 32 32-14.3 32-32-14.3-32-32-32zm112 0c-17.7 0-32 14.3-32 32s14.3 32 32 32 32-14.3 32-32-14.3-32-32-32zm112 0c-17.7 0-32 14.3-32 32s14.3 32 32 32 32-14.3 32-32-14.3-32-32-32zM256 32C114.6 32 0 125.1 0 240c0 47.6 19.9 91.2 52.9 126.3C38 405.7 7 439.1 6.5 439.5c-6.6 7-8.4 17.2-4.6 26S14.4 480 24 480c61.5 0 110-25.7 139.1-46.3C192 442.8 223.2 448 256 448c141.4 0 256-93.1 256-208S397.4 32 256 32zm0 368c-26.7 0-53.1-4.1-78.4-12.1l-22.7-7.2-19.5 13.8c-14.3 10.1-33.9 21.4-57.5 29 7.3-12.1 14.4-25.7 19.9-40.2l10.6-28.1-20.6-21.8C69.7 314.1 48 282.2 48 240c0-88.2 93.3-160 208-160s208 71.8 208 160-93.3 160-208 160z\"><\/path><\/svg>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-icon-list-text elementor-post-info__item elementor-post-info__item--type-comments\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\tNo Comments\t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t\t\t\t<\/li>\n\t\t\t\t<\/ul>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-5987f3d elementor-widget elementor-widget-shortcode\" data-id=\"5987f3d\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"shortcode.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-shortcode\"><span class=\"bsf-rt-reading-time\"><span class=\"bsf-rt-display-label\" prefix=\"Reading Time\">\n\t\t<\/span> <span class=\"bsf-rt-display-time\" reading_time=\"2\"><\/span> \n\t\t<span class=\"bsf-rt-display-postfix\" postfix=\"mins\"><\/span><\/span><\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-67bc5fb e-con-full e-flex e-con e-child\" data-id=\"67bc5fb\" data-element_type=\"container\" data-e-type=\"container\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-1be4a17e elementor-widget elementor-widget-theme-post-featured-image elementor-widget-image\" data-id=\"1be4a17e\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"theme-post-featured-image.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/chicagoexecutivecoaching.com\/smartleadership\/wp-content\/uploads\/elementor\/thumbs\/distracted_couple-qon9jaad4fphj3dgsgm1dmfeyou3avaw32ecj9tds0.jpg\" title=\"distracted_couple-sf\" alt=\"Distracted Listening\" loading=\"lazy\" \/>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-34671571 e-flex e-con-boxed e-con e-child\" data-id=\"34671571\" data-element_type=\"container\" data-e-type=\"container\" data-settings=\"{&quot;background_background&quot;:&quot;classic&quot;}\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"e-con-inner\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-383e67f0 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"383e67f0\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h2 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">The Leadership AI Deep-Dive<\/h2>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-24d59f3e elementor-widget__width-initial elementor-widget elementor-widget-html\" data-id=\"24d59f3e\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"html.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<iframe \r\n    src=\"https:\/\/www.buzzsprout.com\/2608746\/19030123?client_source=small_player&iframe=true&referrer=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.buzzsprout.com%2F2608746%2F19030123.js?container_id=buzzsprout-player-19030123&player=small\" \r\n    width=\"100%\" \r\n    height=\"200\" \r\n    frameborder=\"0\" \r\n    scrolling=\"no\" \r\n    title=\"Leadership Breakthroughs Podcast\">\r\n<\/iframe>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-6c3fc19d elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"6c3fc19d\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p>In this short audio exploration, I\u2019ve tasked an AI version of my voice to sit down with host &#8216;Alex&#8217; to dive deeper into the mindsets discussed in this post. While the audio is synthesized, the insights are 100% human-driven. Listen while you&#8217;re on the move.<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-e61a16c e-flex e-con-boxed e-con e-parent\" data-id=\"e61a16c\" data-element_type=\"container\" data-e-type=\"container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"e-con-inner\">\n\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-511c0f9 e-con-full e-flex e-con e-child\" data-id=\"511c0f9\" data-element_type=\"container\" data-e-type=\"container\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-e36f670 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"e36f670\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<h3><img fetchpriority=\"high\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright wp-image-3955 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/chicagoexecutivecoaching.com\/smartleadership\/wp-content\/uploads\/phone.png\" alt=\"Smart Phone\" width=\"260\" height=\"279\" title=\"\">Electronic Distractions<\/h3><p>Texting while driving is a practice proven to be dangerous and even fatal. We now have laws prohibiting the use of hand-held devices that cause <em><strong>distracted driving<\/strong><\/em>. I hope you&#8217;re a law-abiding driver.<\/p><p>Even though you&#8217;re <em>not<\/em> using your phone while you&#8217;re behind the wheel, you still have ample opportunities to stay connected with the wireless world. Let&#8217;s assume you&#8217;ve conquered the demons of <strong><em>distracted driving<\/em><\/strong>. I&#8217;d like to make you aware of a new challenge: <strong><em>distracted listening<\/em><\/strong>.\u00a0 This occurs when you&#8217;re physically <em>with<\/em> another person <em>but<\/em> your attention and interests are elsewhere.\u00a0 Your hand-held device makes distracted listening an even bigger challenge.<\/p><p>Distracted listening is not as <em>physically<\/em> dangerous as distracted driving.\u00a0 But it is highly hazardous to your ability to develop meaningful relationships. Consider&#8230;<\/p><h3>How Do YOU Feel?<\/h3><figure id=\"attachment_4070\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-4070\" style=\"width: 330px\" class=\"wp-caption alignright\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-4070 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/chicagoexecutivecoaching.com\/smartleadership\/wp-content\/uploads\/distracted_couple.jpg\" alt=\"Distracted Listening\" width=\"330\" height=\"220\" title=\"\" srcset=\"https:\/\/chicagoexecutivecoaching.com\/smartleadership\/wp-content\/uploads\/distracted_couple.jpg 330w, https:\/\/chicagoexecutivecoaching.com\/smartleadership\/wp-content\/uploads\/distracted_couple-300x200.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 330px) 100vw, 330px\" \/><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-4070\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Licensed by StockFresh<\/figcaption><\/figure><p>Think about a time when you&#8217;re with someone who is paying more attention to an electronic device than to <em>you<\/em>. How does that person make you <strong><em>feel<\/em><\/strong>? Do these feelings capture the experience?<\/p><ul><li>Insulted<\/li><li>Angry<\/li><li>Frustrated<\/li><li>Diminished<\/li><li>Disrespected<\/li><li>Slighted<\/li><\/ul><p>Is it possible that you are inflicting these same feelings on others when the distracted listener is YOU?\u00a0 And the habit is not limited to electronic distractions.<\/p><p>Why would you choose to be so distracted?\u00a0 While it is likely not a <em>conscious<\/em> choice, that doesn&#8217;t diminish the emotional punishment that you&#8217;re dishing out. Consider the public service announcement slogan about distracted driving:<\/p><blockquote><p><strong>&#8220;It can wait.&#8221;<\/strong><\/p><\/blockquote><h3>Is <em>Distracted Listening<\/em> a Habit You Want to Change?<\/h3><p>If so, just trying to <strong><em>stop<\/em> <\/strong>doing it doesn&#8217;t work. In order to change a habit, you must replace it with something else. You need to be aware of the consequences and care enough to make a change.\u00a0 So here&#8217;s my suggestion.\u00a0 <strong>Begin<\/strong> each interaction with&#8230;<\/p><h3>The Cure: Start With Two Minutes of <em><strong>Total Presence<\/strong><\/em><\/h3><h3><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright wp-image-4072 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/chicagoexecutivecoaching.com\/smartleadership\/wp-content\/uploads\/stopwatch-mso.jpg\" alt=\"Stop Watch\" width=\"240\" height=\"275\" title=\"\"><\/h3><p>What is &#8220;<strong>Total Presence&#8221;<\/strong>?\u00a0 This occurs when you consciously give the other person your engaged, exclusive attention.<\/p><ul><li>No distractions<\/li><li>Complete Engagement<\/li><li>Listen with your eyes and your ears<\/li><li>Use those senses to understand the body language and emotions<\/li><li>Nothing else matters for that moment<\/li><\/ul><p>Those two minutes give you momentum for a quality interaction.\u00a0 <strong>Make it a habit.<\/strong> For the rest of the time, don&#8217;t you dare <em>screw up<\/em> your rapport by reaching for an electronic device. It is guaranteed to inflict emotional distress on another human being.<\/p><h3>Related Posts<\/h3><ul><li><a href=\"https:\/\/chicagoexecutivecoaching.com\/smartleadership\/smart-phones-dumb-people\/\">Smart Phones, Dumb People<\/a><\/li><li><a title=\"Should Interruptions Be Pardoned?\" href=\"https:\/\/chicagoexecutivecoaching.com\/smartleadership\/interruptions\/\">Should Interruptions be Pardoned?<\/a><\/li><li><a href=\"https:\/\/chicagoexecutivecoaching.com\/smartleadership\/the-encore-to-start-with-why\/\">Leadership Biology 201<\/a><\/li><li><a href=\"https:\/\/chicagoexecutivecoaching.com\/smartleadership\/body-language-breakthrough\/\">Body Language Breakthrough<\/a><\/li><li><a href=\"https:\/\/chicagoexecutivecoaching.com\/smartleadership\/just-dont-do-it\/\">Just Don\u2019t Do It<\/a><\/li><\/ul>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>We now have laws prohibiting distracted driving.  It&#8217;s proven to be dangerous and sometimes fatal.  If you&#8217;re not using your phone while you&#8217;re behind the wheel, it still leaves ample opportunities to stay connected with the wireless world. Once you&#8217;ve conquered the demons of distracted driving, your next challenge is distracted listening.  This occurs when you&#8217;re physically with another person but your attention and interests are elsewhere.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":4070,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"Distracted Listening - your next hand device vice  http:\/\/wp.me\/p1I2Yr-13B","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"_wpscppro_dont_share_socialmedia":false,"_wpscppro_custom_social_share_image":0,"_facebook_share_type":"","_twitter_share_type":"","_linkedin_share_type":"","_pinterest_share_type":"","_linkedin_share_type_page":"","_instagram_share_type":"","_medium_share_type":"","_threads_share_type":"","_google_business_share_type":"","_selected_social_profile":[],"_wpsp_enable_custom_social_template":false,"_wpsp_social_scheduling":{"enabled":false,"datetime":null,"platforms":[],"status":"template_only","dateOption":"today","timeOption":"now","customDays":"","customHours":"","customDate":"","customTime":"","schedulingType":"absolute"},"_wpsp_active_default_template":true},"categories":[24,170,208,29,30],"tags":[283,190,42],"class_list":["post-4067","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-communication-skills","category-executive-coaching","category-influencing-skills-2","category-leadership-development","category-listening-skill","tag-communication-skills","tag-non-verbal-communication","tag-self-leadership"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/chicagoexecutivecoaching.com\/smartleadership\/wp-content\/uploads\/distracted_couple.jpg","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p1I2Yr-13B","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoexecutivecoaching.com\/smartleadership\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4067","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoexecutivecoaching.com\/smartleadership\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoexecutivecoaching.com\/smartleadership\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoexecutivecoaching.com\/smartleadership\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoexecutivecoaching.com\/smartleadership\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4067"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoexecutivecoaching.com\/smartleadership\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4067\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":17624,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoexecutivecoaching.com\/smartleadership\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4067\/revisions\/17624"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoexecutivecoaching.com\/smartleadership\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/4070"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/chicagoexecutivecoaching.com\/smartleadership\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4067"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoexecutivecoaching.com\/smartleadership\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4067"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chicagoexecutivecoaching.com\/smartleadership\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4067"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}