
In developing my coaching skills, I’ve needed to learn a few tricks of the trade. One is a heightened ability for engagement detection. Another is gain skills for improving the mindset of the disengaged. Here’s some simple ways to do-it-yourself.
I’ve learned to observe both my clients and participants and place them into three categories: achievers, vacationers and prisoners. So, how do we recognize the members of these categories?
I learned early on the importance of recognizing vacationers and prisoners and working to convert them into achievers. Might this be equally true for you?
When developing teams or groups, I typically negotiate the authority to release the prisoners, as needed. It is true what they say about one bad apple spoiling the bunch. Prisoners are bad apples. For one-on-one coaching engagements, I am careful to avoid scenarios where I am assigned a prisoner with little motive to change. Without that motivation, we’re all wasting our time and money while setting ourselves up to fail.
Nine years ago I was an executive coaching rookie. I was working with four member management team to develop their strategy and leadership skills. At our second conference, the owner and President announced that he “didn’t have time” to complete the assigned work. He was, after all, the boss. And he felt that his status allowed him to skate. It was a fork in the road, moment of truth in the engagement and our relationship. Did I dare to challenge the person signing my checks? Or should avoid ruffling any feathers, sweep it under the rug and move on?
Fortunately I had secured a verbal commitment for timely completion of their assignments from each member of the team. And, I understood that the owner had provided me a golden opportunity to offer a lesson in the relationship between integrity and leadership. I was trained to challenge vacationers who didn’t live up to their promises. So I seized the moment without hesitation. While putting my momentary conversational comfort ahead of the purpose of the engagement made little sense, it required courage. But at that moment, his vacation ended. Their company went on to achieve unprecedented success in the succeeding months. Our relationship remains strong to this day. Plus, I also learned the value of putting a client relationship at risk for the sake of their success.
Might you benefit from enhanced Engagement Detection skills? What if you were better tuned in to the attitudes on your teams? Observe the body language around your conference table, place your participants in my three categories and ask…
You might also use this tool for some Self-Engagement Detection. When you are introduced to new initiatives or innovative concepts, in which category would your teammates place you?
Should you find yourself mentally serving time, take one of my GET OUT OF JAIL, FREE cards for free. Make a conscious choice to let go of this mindset. It serves no one.
Since I discovered and converted that first Vacationer, I’ve helped many others to decide to do the push-ups they need to achieve bigger and better things. I’ve also succeeded converting some of my Prisoners to transition to Achiever status. Where there’s a will, there’s a way. Those Prisoners who are unable to discover their motive for change are better off being freed. Where there’s no will, there’s no way.
To keep it simple, here’s my process for improving engagement:
I said these are simple. I don’t promise that they’re easy. Should you struggle, let me know if I can help.
Tom Lemanski helps accomplished leaders unlock potential, solve complex challenges, and amplify their impact.
Effective leadership is the key to driving meaningful, lasting success in a fast-changing world.
Tom’s focus on innovative strategies and self-awareness creates transformative results for leaders striving for the next level.
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“Power today comes from sharing information, not from withholding it.'” – Keith Ferrazzi
3 Responses
rather than think of manager; think leader, tour guide or warden. Per Druker, Managers direct things, leaders lead people.
Thanks Terry, You’re right. I have edited appropriately.
Tom,
You forgot one key category of the disengaged – the Sophisticates. These are folks who, if they had one of those cartoon dialogue bubbles above their heads it would read something, “I already know this stuff,” or “I should have her job.”
When Sophisticates do speak, they will often start with something like, “Well, Tom, in my experience…”
What I’ve learned is that when I treat everyone as an “achiever” and expect such achievements from them, most people will in fact begin to act more like achievers.
Sophisticated either believe they already know it all and have nothing more to learn or, more likely, are afraid to show that they still have plenty to learn and need to grow as much – or more – than anyone. Whether it is developmental arrogance or fear, the also present an uphill battle.